Salve for the Hurting Soul

For those of us who live in chronic pain, I’d like to ask a question: Do you remember life before the pain? I can, but just barely. Remember the days when you never stressed about a day (or week) long family outing, and not only what it would do to your physical and mental health, but what it would do to those around you as your pain increases and your emotional stability decreases?

Man, when I was a kid, I LOVED to climb the jungle gym. The higher and more complex, the better. I also played a LOT of tackle football. In fact, I drove my friends crazy with it, because football is all I ever wanted to play. When I was a kid we would have neighborhood games, and even when I was smaller than most people there, I seemed to be fearless. I’d run right at someone twice my size, taking the hits and laughing on the way to the ground.

I don’t like talking about this, honestly, because it brings me down. There are SO many emotions that go with a chronic condition, aren’t there? 

Fear of doing certain activities because it makes your already low quality of life decline even more. 

Depression, for many reasons: you’re not the person you once were, you can’t do what you wanna do, and the prospect of living like this for decades more is almost too much to bear sometimes. 

Anxiety, because you honestly don’t know what’s gonna trigger the pain and send you into a week-long hell of existence. 

Anger about, well, ALL of the above. “Why can’t I do what others can do?” “This isn’t fair, what did I ever do to deserve this???!!!”

Well, I’d love to tell you that “I have found the answer to all your problems!” This is not the case, and anyone who says that is trying to sell you something. But one thing I will say, and pay close attention to this:

Jesus is still on the throne. God is still King of the Universe, and all of Heaven, Earth and Hell must bow to Him.

“So how does this help?” you ask.

Psalm 34:18 says, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues those whose spirits are crushed.” The MESSAGE Bible translation words that verse this way: “If your heart is broken, you’ll find God right there; if you’re kicked in the gut, He’ll help you catch your breath.” Out of all the various methods I’ve tried to help deal with my pain (drugs, mind tricks, meditation), one stands out head-and-shoulders above the rest.

Are you ready for it? For many, this isn’t gonna be what you think, and might even be a bit of a let-down. Here it is:

WORSHIP

“Wait, what?!” you might ask.

When I was younger, I saw God as the Creator, a somewhat distant Father who, truth be told, wasn’t really too concerned about me. Oh, He loved me, I believed, but did He really care enough to intertwine Himself with my daily life? Absolutely NOT, I thought. I pictured Him on the throne, staring at me, emotionless, telling me to pick myself up by my own bootstraps. “Keep going,” I figured He would tell me, “you’ll get to Heaven someday. Until then you’re on your own.”

Now that I’m older and a LITTLE wiser, I can tell you, this is absolutely NOT the case! I won’t take up anymore room than I already am with biblical “proof” of God’s love; one Google search for “Bible verses about how much God loves me” will do that. What I will tell you is that, the more I worship, and the deeper I get into it, the better I feel.

When I worship, I cry, I laugh, and then I cry some more, and sometimes the tears come HARD AND UGLY. It’s not a pretty sight, me crying from my soul as I feel the burdens begin to lighten up, but I just let those tears flow. I can’t explain it (I’m no theologian, just a writer, husband, dad, “Poppy” and chronic pain sufferer), but the closer I get to Jesus, the better I feel.

So don’t be afraid to find somewhere you can be alone, put on some worship music and just begin to praise the Lord. Don’t even ask Him for anything; just thank Him for love and the beauty of life. Thank Him for salvation and the strength to get through today.

Worship is salve for the hurting soul, I’m tellin’ ya!

Don’t take my word for it, try it yourself, and lemme know how it goes. Love you guys. Blessings.