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“I wish…
“No. Wishing is wrong. It’s the wrong word right now.

“That’s not what I mean.
“What I mean is…
“I believe in God.”

Morgan Freeman, Deep Impact

I’m sure you waste time wishing certain things never happened, same as I do.

I wish I didn’t have to suffer this chronic, maddening pain.

I wish I could get a good night’s sleep.

I wish I made more money.

I wish just ONE of my creative endeavors would succeed.

I wish, one year ago this week, my granddaughter, Rosalee, wouldn’t have passed away when my daughter-in-law Maria was 23 weeks pregnant. I thought I’d gone a long way towards accepting this, until the one-year anniversary hit. I was simultaneously sad and angry and couldn’t wait for that day to be over.

On and on the wishing could go, and to be frank, I started this blog on July 13, Rosalee’s birthday, but stopped after saying I wish she hadn’t passed away. I didn’t know where I was going with this, honestly, so I saved it as a “draft,” and am just now coming back to it.

We could wish all day, but many times it’s a futile act. As I was contemplating the direction of this piece, however, a thought hit me:

“How many people are wishing they could be in my shoes?”

How many wish they were still happily married to their absolute BEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD after 35 years (I love you, Laura Anne!)?

How many wish their kids were happy, healthy and serving the Lord, like mine are (I love you, Jess and Trey!)?

How many wish their kids were happily married to wonderful people with whom they actually get along (I love you Josh and Maria!)?

How many wish they had wonderful grandchildren, as Laura and I do (I love you Joshy, Jenna, Rosalee and Davey!)?

How many wish they could be serving God in their job, knowing they go to work every day, building His Kingdom (I love you…wait, never mind…)?

How many wish they had a working vehicle?

How many wish they could pay all their bills and still have a little money left over at the end of the month?

How many wish they had a permanent roof over their head and food in their belly?

How many wish they were happy? Yes, I struggle with chronic pain, which brings on depression, anger and even despair, but I have an incredible life, and am so blessed.

Thus, instead of wishing for things to be better, today I’m going to try (note I said “try”) to thank God for all I DO have.

Thank you, Lord, for such rich blessings. I’ll take the mid-day rain, since the sun shines so bright the rest of the day.

So those are my thoughts for today. I pray God touch your heart today, and give you peace and joy you never dreamed possible.


This entry was posted in Pain.
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